Posts : 844 Join date : 2009-06-15 Age : 32 Location : Seattle/Whidbey Island, WA
Subject: 10 Good Reasons to Ban Guns (satire) Sat Jul 17, 2010 4:56 pm
Something I found on Airsoft Pacific and thought I'd share:
Quote :
Ten Good Reasons To Ban Guns, A Satire by Bruce Gold
1.) Guns are used in self-defense over 2 million times a year. However, this makes the attempted crime a "non-event," which necessarily complicates the Police investigation. Without civilian ownership of guns, these Police investigations would not have been compromised. Civilians should leave crime prevention to the Police, who are properly equipped to investigate following the crime's completion.
2.) Some .004 % (4/1000 of 1%) of guns are used in crime each year. This is way too high. All guns should be banned
3.) Guns are unnecessary. In 98% of civilian gun defenses, no shot is fired. If you are not going to fire a shot, you clearly don't need a gun. This proves that the guns are unnecessary. Banning guns will prevent these unnecessary defenses.
4.) Guns cause criminal migration. In tough gun-law Washington, D. C., violent crime rates are very high. This high crime rate is caused by the migration of criminals from gun havens like Virginia. This migration is caused by the criminal's cowardly avoidance of armed householders and concealed-carry civilians. This criminal migration is detrimental to helpless unarmed citizens in no-gun areas and must be stopped. Guns should be banned everywhere.
5.) Most gun crimes are committed by inner city gangs and drug dealers. These relatively small and geographically restricted groups consistently commit the majority of gun crimes, which usually peak as turf wars erupt over Drug War changes. The best way to prevent this is by denying guns to all law abiding people everywhere.
6.) No woman needs to protect herself from rape, assault or murder. The Police will protect women by investigating the crime after the fact. Remember, Police paperwork is all the protection anyone really needs.
7.) Guns owners are disrespectful of authority. Good citizens should completely rely on the authorities. A failure to do so is an invariable sign of improper and overly independent attitudes. Failure to completely and absolutely trust and depend on the authorities is excessive democracy and sends a bad message to children.
8.) Guns owners engaging in self-defense are taking the law into their own hands. This is wrong. Only the Police and Criminals have the right to take the law into their own hands. Guns should be kept out of the hands of law abiding citizens.
9.) Children and young people should remain ignorant about guns. Real guns and real gun knowledge dissipate the fantasies created by violent video games and TV. Ignorance, once lost, can never be restored and needs to be protected. Not to mention the lost sales of all the violent movies, TV shows, video games, etc!
10.) Guns reduce people's reliance on the Police and Government. This fosters a mistaken belief in "rights". No person has the right to question authority. No person should be less than 100% dependent on authority. This is fundamental to social order. Banning guns will help to establish the Order the authorities want. This is good.
Posts : 2481 Join date : 2009-03-29 Location : here, not there, Earth
Subject: Re: 10 Good Reasons to Ban Guns (satire) Sat Jul 17, 2010 5:09 pm
wow..... I think all my guns are going to be flocking to DC because of hard laws against it while I go vigilante with a bumper sticker that says NO POLICE THANK YOU I GOT A GUN......
I think that is kinda screwed up
Spl. Durkee General Grade 2
Posts : 4652 Join date : 2009-03-28 Age : 67
Subject: Re: 10 Good Reasons to Ban Guns (satire) Sat Jul 17, 2010 5:15 pm
LOL haha that was great. Nice find
DrummerBoyz95 General Grade 2
Posts : 3897 Join date : 2009-05-13 Age : 28 Location : Ventura County, CA
Subject: Re: 10 Good Reasons to Ban Guns (satire) Sat Jul 17, 2010 9:47 pm
Haha that was a good read.
M14 double-taps Moderator
Posts : 2106 Join date : 2008-07-13 Age : 30 Location : St. Louis, MO
Subject: Re: 10 Good Reasons to Ban Guns (satire) Sat Jul 17, 2010 9:56 pm
That was just a comets WIN. Wish I had this when the gun-laws topic came up on my debate team
iliveforthis99 Colonel
Posts : 1492 Join date : 2009-04-18 Age : 35 Location : Virginia
Subject: Re: 10 Good Reasons to Ban Guns (satire) Sun Jul 18, 2010 2:07 am
Haha i needed the laugh that just gave me tonight.
#9 is great because be we're already kinda there. It's amazing how many kids even teens have little knowledge about guns and even less knowledge on how they should be handled these days. They really do think it's like the digital versions in video games.
Insane Mercc Colonel
Posts : 1693 Join date : 2008-12-16 Age : 30 Location : Western Minnesota
Subject: Re: 10 Good Reasons to Ban Guns (satire) Mon Jul 19, 2010 11:15 pm
\"Watch your language\" liberals!! Trying to screw up us rednecks!!
SnoSnipe Colonel
Posts : 1961 Join date : 2010-01-01 Age : 30 Location : Washington, USA
Subject: Re: 10 Good Reasons to Ban Guns (satire) Mon Jul 19, 2010 11:58 pm
Insane Mercc wrote:
"Watch your language" liberals!! Trying to screw up us rednecks!!
DANM THEM TO HEL L
mgunner564 Colonel
Posts : 1303 Join date : 2009-02-03 Age : 113 Location : Maine
Subject: Re: 10 Good Reasons to Ban Guns (satire) Tue Jul 20, 2010 9:04 am
The truth is, they can never ban guns. Second Amendment FTW!
iliveforthis99 Colonel
Posts : 1492 Join date : 2009-04-18 Age : 35 Location : Virginia
Subject: Re: 10 Good Reasons to Ban Guns (satire) Tue Jul 20, 2010 9:12 am
No it's 'cause of them \"Watch your language\" rednecks not some words on a piece of paper
mgunner564 Colonel
Posts : 1303 Join date : 2009-02-03 Age : 113 Location : Maine
Subject: Re: 10 Good Reasons to Ban Guns (satire) Tue Jul 20, 2010 11:42 pm
....True......
Spl. Durkee General Grade 2
Posts : 4652 Join date : 2009-03-28 Age : 67
Subject: Re: 10 Good Reasons to Ban Guns (satire) Wed Jul 21, 2010 1:26 pm